if only i could turn back time

i wish u never touched my heart

2006-07-27T10:37:00.000-07:00

now that u have. .there's no turning back. .kinda regret knowing u. .but at the same time im glad that u came into my life. .bcos of u. .i began to appreciate the lil things in life again. .and i learnt how to takecare of myself a lil more. .i admit that i regret letting u go. .cos we gave up before giving us a chance. .is like walking up to the racing line. .ready. .set. .and then u back off that kind of thing. .i also wonder how did u grew so cold to me so soon. .why did u seem nice yesterday but cold me today. .what is wrong with you? .but most importantly. .wht is wrong with me

i guess u n i weren't meant to be

2006-07-16T13:17:00.000-07:00

cos the one thing i cannot accept is someone trying to change me.. why?.. because that's what makes me me.. it makes me feel like u dont accept me for who i am which in a way.. is kinda u know.. suddenly i feel better.. i am gonna be alright again.. two lessons learnt. one, do not make ur decisions so quickly.. two, stick with the decision u made. even if we weren't meant to be.. glad u came and made my life beautiful. even if it was just a while =)

i wish that i told you that i loved you..

2006-07-11T07:13:00.000-07:00

..i didnt know how much i loved you until i lost you.. you taught me what love was but i did not dare to fall in love with you.. i cant belive i had you and let you go just like that.. we hvnt even went to the cinema or go for shisha like we planned even before we were together.. but the worst part was.. i didnt even get to tell you how much i loved you

could this be true love?

2006-07-03T04:50:00.000-07:00

tell me im not falling.. oh no what this weird feeling?? i know this feeling.. but i hvnt felt this way for such a long time.. oh dear.. i dont know why im feeling this way.. have i finally found true love?? im so scared. he is so sweet. what if i mess up? what if i dont dare to trust? what if he never really forgot about his x..

antibiotics i love u!

2006-06-19T08:53:00.000-07:00

alot of us take breathing for granted.. weed almost killed me. no shit wei. it happend at a party. after i took it i felt thirsty.. then after that i felt that there was something wrong with my throught. i thought it'll help if i smoked and drank again. then i knew something was gonna hit me. so i quickly got myself on a comfortable place which was on the sofa and asked my fren to get me hot water. then i found myself sufforcating.. "i cant breath properly!!' i shouted as loud as i could "call the hospital!" ofcos no one did that,cos all of us would get busted plus majority of them were too high and drunk to think straight. all of them surounded me some stoning and all.. then the loud party noise dimmed and became softer. my visions darkerned. i thought i was going to die. my last visions were of someone handing me a glass of milk saying "chill man.. drink some milk" i was like chill ur head la.. mahai im dying here! but i just snatched the glass of milk and drank it all up plus a glass of water. my visions brighten up again.. but the sufforcating continued. do u know what suffocating feels like? try breathing in a plastic bag tied onto ur head the whole day, thats what it feels like! so pls be considerate dont ask anyone to "chill" when they are sufforcating okay? i thought it would go away the next day. but it still stayed and never got any better till i got medical attention from the nearest clinic. the docter said i got lung infection and gave me antibiotics. i dont wanna go though this again. im not gonna touch cigs anytime soon. this has to be the most scaryest moment in my life.

confusing laa..

2006-06-12T08:46:00.000-07:00

majibai wht did i just do?..ok at first he did seem like he just wants to get laid.. now when i dunwan him he like.. kinda really likes me.. ok this is so confusing.. he want ass or me? or im an ass. ahh duno lah.. just glad to be single again* haha.. man all this thinking is making me hungry

my mystery guy

2006-06-07T03:04:00.001-07:00

omg okay.. i hardly know this guy.. but i think he wants to have a relationship with me last night but we just met yesterday.. but first i have to ask him if he could change his number to o16 cos he's using o17.. mahai burn credit u know? sommore o16 is better cos can unlimited smsing for free hehe.. anyways.. we met each other 1 month ago in friendster cos i add him.. then he msg me.. then until yesterday oni we met at the smoking area.. i duno much about this guy la.. but he's hot and thats all that matters now..muahaha ;p

1314

2006-05-24T08:39:00.000-07:00

well.. i don't know how to say this and im sure that the person i'm writing about isin't reading this now cos well.. that person doesn't have a blog and is probably busy kicking out at cc as usual. hmm.. we had a good time together though it wasnt very long till we didnt contact anymore.. maybe bcos i was angry that he told his friends that we were together when we were totally not! not that i don't wanna be his gf.. i had feelings for him.. but becos of the age gap. but i felt like he was more interested in showing me off to his friends then interested in me. sometimes i even wonder if he actually really liked me or not eventhough he told me that he loved me more than twice and i told him that i loved him too.. well but now no more la since this love story was a few months ago.. anyways, the scar reminds me that the past is real. 1314 i know he will never forget me bcos...

if only i could turn back time

2006-04-29T07:35:00.000-07:00

i was so caught up with what i had instead of what i could have had. i wish i was not in such a hurry to get what i want instead of what i need. i had a chance to live my dream. but i threw it away without even realising it. i thought i was happy with what i already had. but that was after i woke up and realised that i was living each day the way how it should be, not the way i wanted it to be. there's nothing i can to bring back the spark now that the feelings that we had are gone. but i kept wondering what it would be like today if we gave love a chance. everytime i see you or everytime we bump into each other, i wish i could seize that one moment in time forever. if only you waited a little longer and if only i realised a little earlyer, we could have been together.